You were there, and it was good in the beginning.

Proof the Lions aren’t total aholes.  

Unhappy with Stafford?! File this under wtf. I am aware that “That's a lot of money for a guy sitting behind Daunte Culpepper” but Culpepper should go ahead and leave, his social security check will tie him over.  I just think he’s peaked - out there all Brett Favre’n.

  

I am drafting my open letter to Stafford in hopes I can give him the ol’ personal tour of town, the non-sketchy part of the D. We do live close to Calvin! 

Thank you jeebus for allowing me to finally thaw out from the longest winter, ever. Yea,  like record breaking long. Went out circa college style Friday night with some fantastic pals. I really appreciated sleeping 3 deep in a king bed, quality arrangement. 

Andy was here this past weekend….And Indy wasn’t without the dramatics. Little devil. It proved difficult having to keep up with Roo, the NFL draft and Food Network Challenge. 

Mikey Likes It – If you’re achin’ for some bacon, you can get swine flu too! I think Miss Piggy’s PR team is working overtime. Seriously, I didn’t know what the oink it was. Thank you Science is Sexy: What is Swine Flu? How Does an Animal Disease Spread to a Human Host?

Essentially, influenza (aka, “The Flu”) is a viral infection that attacks our population in a yearly cycle.  Fortunately, the human immune system is there to recognize and neutralize the effects of the virus.  Each year, the virus mutates just slightly and most of the population is once again susceptible to the disease.  This is why a new vaccine must be created regularly to reflect the most recent influenza mutants out in the environment.  Under normal circumstances, this is all you need to know about the flu (aside from how to avoid infection and take care of yourself if you do come down with it).

If you don’t get Mega Beast or cobwebs, well this Drop Dead Fred remake isn’t for you.

9 Amazing 3D Pavement Paintings: making sidewalk chalk hopscotch it’s biyatch for years.

You Always Wanted to Have a Pet, but Your Pet Didn't Always Want to Have You

I think it was snowing just yesterday. Whatever. 

You're on my team! Yea you, the lucky guy I married. We're peanut butter and jelly, Hall and Oates. So why nag on the home team, when your really picking on your partner. You're playing on the same side, and you're only as good as the weakest player. And if you're on my team, we don't suck. A coach and a player may have fights and you might need relief now and then but remember we're on a team, and I don’t like losing. 

Mr. Umberger, do you remember meeting Brad Stuart? It’s the second failed attempt to get up that is priceless.

 

Hate you/love you Bravo! The Real Housewives of New Jersey are bringing it heavy. I love me some Italian drama. The pearls, the nails, the hair, the gum chewing. UGH fabulous. 

Love it. Our little spots in Costa Rica were featured on HGTV’s House Hunters International.  We typically tune in to see how poor our standard of living is. Had no idea living in CR was so expensivo! 

Mikey Likes It –  Wait for it… wait for it.

Ghost Riding - Click here for the most popular videos

Stuck a feather in her dress and called it ugly-roni. $1.5 million for poppycock.

You're everyone's problem.

This week has been insane. And what the fudge is with the weather. Snow flurries? Bite me big time.

And dear Bravo network, if you are going to play a classic such as Top Gun, do us all a favor and don’t show the cliff notes. Seriously, what was I watching, the trailer? No volleyball scene, no ‘great balls of fire’ - do you think that your viewers can’t quote that movie by now? It did come out 10+ years ago. Lame.

Pep Talk: Everybody has a past. You’ve done things that can’t be taken back and it’s not anybody’s business to scold or criticize you. The fortuitous, pixie dust sprinkled moment you meet a new friend or lover is preceded by a life long string of decisions and relationships that led the two of you to this point. You can’t undo your past and if some veritable stranger makes you wish you had a time machine, they aren’t treating you fairly.

Today remind yourself: I practice and deserve acceptance.

Have you tuned into to Discovery’s Out of the Wild? It shows some real a**clowns trying to navigate the Alaskan terrain. What a bunch of puffs. It should be called Living Through A Michigan Winter. 34 degrees was a heat wave in January you wussies.

Mikey Likes It – Things I am obsessed with, The Nightmare Before Christmas. Yes, I tend to watch this movie all year long. It’s like my feel good/closer movie. I was shocked when I first learned that Prince Humperdinck was Jack, but I am SO surprised that the mom from Home Alone aka Catherine O’Hara was Sally! And friggin Pee Wee did a character's voice! Neatorama - this is actually good trivia.

And take note Eddie Murphy, it's OK to not say 'yes' to a sequel: There was talk of a sequel for a while. Obviously it has been quite the cash cow for Disney, so around 2001 they started buzzing about making a computer-animated sequel. Tim Burton managed to talk them out of it, saying that it was really best the way it was and “Jack visits Thanksgivingworld” or something similar just wouldn’t have the same impact and would also cheapen the first film.

With all of my friends having dem babies, and the My First Dictionary is just the spot to help learn the important first words! Warning the site is oddly distributing.

For your afternoon viewing enjoyment. Everyday, average Americans are asked about the stresses of work, birds, and love. Their real responses are set against award-winning animation by Aardman ("Wallace and Gromit"). Check it out!

If two past lovers can remain friends, its either they are still in love, or never were.

Eat it. 

Yes, Jessica. Today officially starts the 3 month hockey season, us Red Wings like to call the playoffs. And finally the sun has come out and people are definitely running crazy around here. I don’t think you understand just how miserable the weather has been this week. Indy finally got to work off some of that backend and he actually snored in his sleep last night. 

PS I wasn't feeling so hot today so I WebMD'd myself. Looks like it's my thyroid or type 1 diabetes. But we have ruled out Alzheimers. 

OK Andy loves this chick.  SNL’s Bittttch Pllleeeaze. 

Mikey Likes It – Move over rap artists and champagne! I bet the country crooners are all over this. Beer Soap! Talk about a bubble bath. 

So, with the Calf & Half Creamer, I see the udder as half full. Half full of mooomnomnom MOO MOO JUICE! 

I know you’ve had some bad weather my Ataliens, but hey it could be worse. How sad is that I actually remember seeing this on AFV, or that I just called it AFV.
via videosift.com

That's the coolest story I've ever heard in my life! Can you tell it again, do you have time?

Totally shot-gunned this idea. Spike seals deal for show on Navy pirate hunter.  I am oddly fascinated by these scoundrels. And there really isn’t anything more overstuffed with ego and testosterone than a Navy Seal. Rightfully so, since they drown you before you are in the club. What has Disney led me to believe all these years!

Andy does have a birthday coming up.

Eyemuffs Taff. While I was away I packed a lovely book, One Fifth Avenue. Because you need 1/5 of anything strong to get through it. Andy kept barking at me to pack Anthony Bourdain's Kitchen Confidential. I succumbed. Well a fewer brain cells into One Fifth I thought I'd skim Bourdain's book. I knew him from his pompous guest appearances on Top Chef and his gritty repertoire on No Reservations. You sitting down Mikey? Not only could I not put it down, but I was seriously bummed to finish it! Gasp, awe! An autobiography about something besides shopping or celebs and I actually enjoyed it.

Kitchen Confidential - Chef at New York's Les Halles and author of Bone in the Throat, Bourdain pulls no punches in this memoir of his years in the restaurant business. His fast-lane personality and glee in recounting sophomoric kitchen pranks might be unbearable were it not for two things: Bourdain is as unsparingly acerbic with himself as he is with others, and he exhibits a sincere and profound love of good food.

Bourdain's humorous cynicism and rhetoric made me want to read more of his works. Oh ladies, it's about to get worse. I don't know if I'll be able to look Candace Bushnell in the face, or read her books again. I am picking up...dignity taking moment in 3, 2...Lord of the Rings. 

In other news Meatloaf chewed through his harness while we were gone and his backend is serious. We have a LOT of running coming up.  

Mikey Likes It – Here comes Peter Cottontail, drinking down the bunny trail. Hiccupy hoppity the police are on their way. Beaster Eer Hegg Eunt  Mikey’s Easter Beer Egg Hunt looks like drunks of fun! Oh wait, I don’t think there were eggs involved. Just a good ol’ Beer Hunt.  That smile sure does look like Christmas morning.

So, all the eggs had numbers in them (over 250) which corresponded to all the different beers in the coolers, which had numbers on the caps. Great variety. 

The Universal Record Database if full of stupid goodies. Like, the world’s most expensive cupcake omnomnom. Jonathan Mervis made a vanilla cupcake appraised at $30,000, a new world record. He topped it with a large Asscher diamond surrounded by eight round diamonds. Pfft. Nobody does it cheap like Sara Lee.

A lie is a lie... unless your friends and family are in on it. Then it's a "commonly held belief."

Yo missed mi babino! Como estas? We had such a fantastic time in Costa Rica. I was trying to wrap up a lot of stuff before I left and I didn't really have time to set any expectations for our vaca. Also, I ended up with an awful stomach bug, which made packing painful and the flight down on Friday not so mucho fun. I tried to be a trooper and when Andy wanted to drink on the plane, I suffered through. 24-hour bug translates en espanol to 72 horas. Don't worry I managed to give it to Roo. Who ya know was forced to stay in the fetal position all day on Sat. Near muerte. I have to get schlep around a foreign airport nauseated out of mi cabeza. Come se dice mucho Pepto!

The house where we were staying was in Hacienda Panilla. We didn’t stay at the resort, we were at the owner’s private home. Roo's step dad knew the owner of the 5000+ acre estate. Dude lives in Decatur and Costa Rica, random I know. The resort/estate area was exclusive - as in didn't see a soul on a mile plus on the beach for an entire day. The house was gorgeous on a cliff overlooking the Pacific. It came with a lovely chef/house mom- Gabby, and a gardener. Gabby was younger than I and spoke un poco engles, which meant I was pulling out every ounce of Spanish I kind of remembered from school. I progressively got better throughout the trip and managed to surprise myself when I was able to recall how to say things like 'how much' when shopping or 'we need to be picked up at xyzm.'

The casa was surrounded by wildlife - monkeys, iguanas, exotic birds, etc. They'd come right up to you. It was 95 or so each day and at night it probably dipped to the high 70s. The sun set at 6PM and rose about 6AM. No daylight savings here. Not having air conditioning was a fun adjustment. Andy would leave our door open at night to let in the breeze and I would wake up in the middle of the night to shut it, afraid I'd be waking up with a fat iguana in my face. No gracias. When the howler monkeys were startling close one night I kept thinking Congo.

We rode horses through the resort and on the beach. A day after my stomach bug and riding a horse, not so much. Zip lining was a blast. The locals where having a time with me, making me go first on the course and seeing how fast they could fling me.

One of my favorite parts was going into town, Tamarindo. Great beach and bars. I was surprised to see how many Patrick Swayze Point Break gringos lived in town. Surfing is as huge on the coast as the waves.

Each day on the beach the tide was different. Some days you could walk along the hundreds of rocks scattered along the coastline, others the waves covered the rocks and would crash right up to the shoreline.

We also ventured to the JW Marriott mecca one night. It was gorgeous and gigantic. Guess that's where all the cocaine dealers vaca - I kid.

I will miss staying in my bathing suit all day and having hair that would make Tina Turner blush. Not having TVs or Blueberrys was perfect. My rapid heartbeat somewhat subsided.

Our trip home bit the big one. We got up at 3 to head to the airport, only to learn our flight departure was bumped from 6 to 7AM. Followed by backing out of the gate and having the captain come on and say there was a maintenance issue. Followed by him coming back on 20 min later saying it was a 5 min fix. Yea, right? But the mechanic lived 30 min in town. Boo.

And if you must know I reached a new tanning plateau, I was darker than Andy, NEVER has that happened kids. Now that I am back in the real world I look like some high school spring breaker/oompa loompa.

Now it’s back to reality when all I have heard on the Detroit news is something I actually want to hear – Stafford coming to the Lions. Don’t think I haven’t e-mailed around to make sure when he comes up here he knows where to go. Calvin Johnson does live nearby…. 

Mikey Likes It – Break me off a piece of that Jes-Us-Bar. 

Eat my stamps. I had a feeling Mikey would likey The Simpsons Stamps.

The misery! The exquisite tragedy! The Susan Hayward of it all!

Happy belated birthday NORAK!! And what did Norak want for her birthday a Facebook account. That’s right folks, you’re my mom’s on Facebook.  Happy Birthday lady! 

Rarely does my remote sit on the Nat Geo channel, but they had a really interesting special on dogs. “Science of Dogs” - Dogs: many see these animals simply as "man's best friend," playful companions that bring comfort and friendship. However, this episode explores the hidden world of selective dog breeding; that is, dogs bred specifically for one task. While this dubious method can produce fantastic results... it can also lead to serious genetic problems. When does breeding go too far? 

It basically showed how breeding dogs for dog shows, competitions or hunting/sniffing can really mess with a pup’s genes. It was tough to watch the poor OCD bull terrier chasing his tail. There was a really cool breed of dogs that man had pretty much messed with to a point where they were going blind, but scientists found a drug that they injected into the eye, causing the dogs to see! And yes, we completely understand why Indy is well…special.

What to drink what to do in Costa Rica!!! Is this my kind of country or what? Omnomnom. The local brewery makes Imperial, a slightly dark and sweet brew now exported to California; it's reminiscent of the Mexican dark beer, Dos Equis, though not as heavy. Pilsen has a more crisp taste comparable to Budweiser. Heineken is brewed locally and not up to part with the real thing. 

Mikey Likes It – Peep this brilliant site! 100 Ways To Kill a Peep is great for all of us who every year think that the marshmallow duck will somehow taste better than previous years. Only to find ourselves spitting out sprinkles.  My favs, the drive-by, Peep Hawk Down and good old fashion OD. 

LISH this is totally for you!! Lish has always dreamed of being the Sprinkles Specialist for Dunkin’ Donuts but this is an upgrade. Time for YOU to make the donuts! Homerize yourself and get ready for Dunkin’ Donuts Create Your Donut contest! Omonomnom would mine be? Something with crème filling of course, and chocolate. 

Sweet lord, the snuggie is now coming for our children. Andy looks like this each morning he tries to put on a shirt and puts his fat head through the armhole. Lame.